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Man may be the measure of all things, but there is only one measure of a man. In a flurry of recent articles, we return again to the classic conundrum, a question that has been asked—and answered—hundreds of times: why oh why are ancient Greek dicks so small? The typical answer, which inevitably comes as a revelation , is that ancient Greeks regarded big dicks as tokens of bestial and barbaric appetitiveness, and considered smaller dicks a mark of restraint and civility. This is a good opportunity, sometimes taken, to reflect on cultural relativity.

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The Measure of a Man

Illustration by Joe Frontel. Scrolling through Instagram this week, I came across a meme that said, "If you're having a bad day, just remember there's females out there who gonna take a small dick tonight and act like they love it cause it's their man. But for men who have micropenises, the punchline is all too real, as is the stigma that comes with having a dick that sometimes really is no larger than a USB stick. A micropenis is defined as a penis that measures less than 2.

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